My part-time religion

The 7th month of the lunar calendar marks the start of the Hungry Ghost Festival, when the gates of Hell open for the spirits to roam the human realm freely. That is if you believe in Taoism.

I am officially registered as a Taoist, simply because my family is Taoist. But since a young age, I subconsciously rejected Taoism as my faith because I could not see the logic behind.

The variety of deities worshipped by Taoists is unbelievable. Ranging from Guan Yin, Da Bo Gong, Tian Gong, to Chinese greats like Confucius, to even fictional characters like Monkey King. The multitude of gods and the non-standardisation of practising Taoism makes me highly sceptical. Whereas Christianity, Buddhism and Islam have publications like the bibles, scrolls and qurans which propagate the faith, Taoism has none. It is hard to even become pious.

Yet, my mother and one maternal uncle possess spiritual connections with deities, ie they are mediums whereby the deity will possess and give advices and help believers. I have witnessed streams of believers appearing at my doorsteps and seeking the advice of Guan Yin. For one, I can testify to the innocence of my mother and it is definitely not the usual scams that people see on news. Any fees that the believers pay are strictly voluntary.

And I have sensitive and highly-irritable eyes and nose. Burning of joss paper and joss sticks makes my eyes teary, nose runny and sneezes involuntarily. I recall this as the first reason I would shirk from burning joss papers for as long as I can remember. Even as I am writing this entry, the burnt smell from the joss paper burning revolves in the air.

Religion - do supreme beings exist or are they fabrications to account for man's ignorance?

The latter, probably. I admit that I will resort to mumbling some prayers when passing by the passage parlour at my void deck, where the murder of a Chinese masseur took place. And I try not to be tee kee, meaning iron teeth literally translated from Hokkien, during the 7th month. It is for fear, ignorance and respect. Afterall, why take the risk?

Once in a blue moon, I do set foot on a temple, the Guan Yin Temple at Bugis - the last time about 2 years ago. But it is only at times of extreme vulnerability that I resort to faith, to gain some tranquility. Otherwise, I continue to chomp away the sacred cow with steaks and burgers.